Hug-and-Kiss Diplomacy Is Over for LGBTQ+ People Too
This week’s diplomatic debacle is a wake-up call for LGBTQ+ people to explore the idea of “queer sovereignty.”
Dominique de Villepin, the former French Prime Minister [2005-2007] who made a name for himself with his impassioned 2003 speech at the United Nations’s Security Council, is having a second wind after falling into oblivion. He has been everywhere these past few days, including the New York Times.
Villepin’s omnipresence is telling. He is a man for this moment. An intellectual with a deep appreciation for literature, he does not get lost in the details and takes no time to shed tears over lost values and betrayal. He plays the tape forward for Europe and articulates a response.
In 2003, he vehemently opposed a destabilizing war that Americans were preparing to launch independently in the Middle East; in 2024, it is about a peace that Americans are preparing to establish on their terms in Eastern Europe. In both cases, he sees long-term unintended consequences.
Donald Trump believes he can solve the problems of the world through power — full, unilateral power. And I can tell you today that the same logic is going to have the same negative, disruptive consequences around the world.
His rationale remains the same. Look at this extract from his 2023 Security Council speech:
In this temple of the United Nations, we are the guardians of an ideal, the guardians of a conscience [...] This message comes to you today from an old country, France, from an old continent like mine, Europe, that has known wars, occupation and barbarity. [...] Faithful to its values, it wishes resolutely to act with all the members of the international community. It believes in our ability to build together a better world.
Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. I heard him say on French Culture this week: “La diplomatie du bisou a des limites aujourd'hui”. It is hard to translate. The best I could come up with was: “Hug-and-kiss diplomacy has its limits today." It’s been in my head since then, as I believe it applies to queer liberation too.
Villepin means that European nations must confront reality. He reiterates this point in his interview in The Guardian yesterday suggesting Europe must “take [its] destiny in [its] own hands” and “stop believing in illusions.” The era of aspiring to a “better world” has passed; now, Europe must focus on securing its place in a world where might makes right. He then lays out concrete steps to consolidate its power that Europe must take to prepare for the inevitable.
This Should Be the Prescription for LGBTQ+ People Too
Even though they hold the strings of a much diminished purse, American LGBTQ+ activists who placed our destiny in the hands of the Democratic Party still dominate the global conversation on how to respond to MAGA’s widespread attack on the “gay liberation” movement. Bad habits die hard. At home, they have articulated a three-pronged strategy around litigation, self-care, and hope for the mid-terms. The movement abroad, paralyzed by MAGA budget cuts, will have to wait.
This strategy is based on wishful thinking and fails to meet the gravity of the moment. At the risk of sounding harsh, American LGBTQ+ activists have long operated under the assumption that progress was inevitable, leaving them ill-prepared for the current backlash. They coasted. Their conviction that things will naturally swing back in our favor remains firm despite evidence to the contrary. Trump, the vengeful President, knows that only 12% of LGBTQ+ voters supported him, the “normal gays” as JD Vance put it. We are in a precarious position.
This strategy also misunderstands the extent of the damage a coalition of three illiberal superpowers—Russia, China, and the U.S.—comprising 23.3% of the world's population, can inflict upon LGBTQ+ lives in a short period. Let alone if they manage to export their new brand of homophobia and transphobia to South and East Asia. We are no longer in an era where setbacks can be litigated away or where market forces can be relied upon to discipline homophobic regimes.
To be blunt, I do not fear extermination for LGBTQ+ people. Our saving grace, and frankly our leverage, is that we are born in random families and social classes, including that of our opponents. But I do fear our entrenchment in a second-class status —a dominated class, stripped of agency, forced to negotiate for dignity rather than demand equality. I suspect Trump, Putin, and Xi will respect the principle that individuals should have the freedom to explore their sexuality, romantic relationships, and even gender expression without constraint while holding the belief that this should not be encouraged and that LGBTQ+ people are an inferior, weaker species altogether.
This is not the future most of us envisioned for the next generation of LGBTQ+ people: we aimed for true equality and economic freedom. Full integration into existing societies might not be achievable anymore: is there a plan B?
Envisioning “Queer Sovereignty”
To avoid this fate, LGBTQ+ people must see themselves for what they are: a distinct people, with collective identity, self-determination, and control over their destiny.
For this to work, we would need to think about ourselves not just as a demographic group or political category but as a people in the sense that Jewish people, Kurds, the Ismaili community, or other minorities have historically understood themselves—as a group with a shared history, struggles, and aspirations for collective agency and self-governance. This is obviously more challenging because we do not have a common religion and clear leadership.
The first logical step would require establishing permanent queer global institutions—beyond NGOs—with real power. Instead of relying on allies or mainstream structures, LGBTQ+ people could invest in education, media, healthcare, and financial systems controlled by the community. Sovereignty in the 21st century is increasingly defined not by territorial control but by dominance over data, economic independence, and cultural autonomy.
As a co-founder of Koppa the LGBTQI+ Economic Lab, I am convinced that LGBTQ+ people should seek economic self-determination—fostering LGBTQ+-owned businesses, financial networks, and community wealth-building to reduce reliance on heteronormative power structures.
A Different Fight
The fight for LGBTQ+ rights has long been framed as a struggle for integration, recognition, and protection within existing power structures. But what if those structures are no longer willing or capable of ensuring our dignity and safety? If the world is shifting toward illiberalism, if democratic backsliding is making queer lives negotiable rather than inalienable, then it is no longer enough to advocate within the system. We must build our own.
Of course, it is easier said than done. It may sound too ambitious for the near-term, but like Villepin outlines for Europe, it is time for queer people to build their place in the new world order ten years from now.
This is not just a call for more activism but for self-governance, self-reliance, and sovereignty. It is time to move beyond litigation battles, symbolic boycotts and “changing hearts and minds” toward a structural reimagining of queer power. In this vision, LGBTQ+ people operate as a transnational people, not just a dispersed political constituency.
For too long, LGBTQ+ people have relied on the goodwill of others—political parties that see us as a wedge issue, corporations that wave the rainbow flag when convenient, and legal systems that offer protections one year and strip them away the next. In 2025, if this week’s diplomatic debacle taught us anything, it is that self-determination does not come from permission—it comes from power.
For us too, “Hug-and-kiss diplomacy” - la diplomatie du bisous - is over. It’s time to stop waiting for security and start building it.
Disclaimer: The views expressed in this newsletter are solely my own and do not necessarily reflect those of any organizations, institutions, or individuals mentioned.
It is refreshing to read this. As one of my colleagues would say, happy these thoughts are starting to emerge in the West. For years, some activists in the so-called Global South have been voicing this need for strategic engagement in safeguarding the liberation of our people.
Past rethinking, there is a need to (re)build the new global infrastructure needed to lead this work. NGOs are no longer the sole conveyors of hope and social change, given their relative effectiveness in civic mobilization. In the current, transition can look at the old providing a stepping stone to the new.
The last two decades - especially the last one - have created something incredible: a globally interconnected queer movement. In preparing for the future, we need to collectively build and strengthen community wealth-building structures to sustain and advance this progress.
We can't afford to go back.
Dear Fabrice, a big thank you for your last Newsletter. In these confusing times, especially in Europe, its helpful to read a clear analysis of the present confusion that reigns my continent now. I grew up in times in which it was clear who the good guys were and who were the bad ones. In a few weeks this order has been changed or at least fundamentally challenged. It was 'announced' before, when I saw the hard right winger's message became more open, better organized, more vicious. But its not the beginning of the end. Europe needs and will develop a new fitting strategy. It will hurt our perhaps too easy going life style but the basic values that have been guiding us since the end of WW2, after dealing with violent dictators, greedy business men and confused populations, are still there.. The boorish Trump and Elon Musk behavior will implode like has been the case with so many similar figures in the past and Europe will resurrect more diverse and stronger than before.